We will play now this game "But before the war" throughout the life, attributing to this piece of life all the new details in which truth and fiction will no longer be separable. I have heard references to the pre-war past twice over the last 24 hours. It is without any tearful regrets, just as a statement.
The expert said the first time that the quality of products produced by our mutual friend was much better before the war, and the friend also said the second time quite calmly about what he had before and what he has now. I think many have already accepted the conditions of a new life and are used to them. So many have passed the stage that is necessary for adaptation. And now most of us will not be able to say whether they want to return to the past after a period of almost three years separating life by before and after.
It was quite normal in the autumn of 2014 – to talk about how it will be when everything gets back in the groove of things. People are firmly entrenched in a new reality which has plans, work, business and other-other-stuff. And there is such a funny thing that not everyone started to live badly. It became bad for those who did not have a good time before. Those who had something before the war just strengthened their position and increased their incomes. The poor became a beggar, the rich not only restored former opportunities, but also accumulated capital.
How can it be? Well, it is easier with the beggars. Not everyone can apply for two pensions which enable them to eat well and buy medicines, so some part of the people who live on the subsidies of the "state" are frankly begging. So a far-reaching dream for all of them is not even the USSR, but a return to the beginning of 2014, when there was an opportunity to take on loans, plan something and eat normally. Not well or perfectly, but just normally. It is now clear that it was good at that time. But it became clear right now, when the financial situation has got worse catastrophically.
And those who just expected a proper kick finally could show themselves – go to work in Russia, conquer big cities or new countries. In other words, this middle class would habitually work in the usual places as before, complaining about the salary, but consistently leaving for vacation with late deals at the same time. Having passed the way of dismissal, unemployment, job search and adaptation in a new environment, this middle class is unlikely to accept a return to the past. Well, yes, it was better, but it is already scary to change this little that has been achieved now. The work even started to be pleasant, there are opportunities for growth. In general, it was good, but let it ride in order it will not become worse.
But those who really could and had before, staying in Luhansk, have passed a really great way. Searches for grabbed machines and equipment, a hard way of re-registering enterprises, searching for suppliers and new market, and other-other-stuff that will be enough for a couple of volumes of useless stories of ups and downs.
How will you abandon all this for which a lot of money, time and forces are spent? And most importantly, many did not only manage to swim out of the seething maelstrom of modern times, but also to take the vacant rental space, find suppliers, hire professionals, buy property at a bargain price and not only to recapture the loss, but also to capitalize on everything.
Of course, trade has always been and will be the most popular. Everyone needs to eat. There is a huge field of activity - from stalls to supermarkets, where the best representatives of the moneyed class shop.
All is divided by the ranks – markets are for the poor, supermarkets are for the rich. Each of these groups say that they have everything in their lives - the usual products, places of leisure, work. Depending on their needs. And who in this case must be saved and from what? Only the very poor, suffering from hunger and a total lack of money. But in this case, they get two pensions, for which the "republican" pensioners have a soft spot. And if they speak for some certainty, at heart everyone is afraid of losing this delicate balance with a pension here and there. That is, everybody have settled somehow.
Those who were inert in the past, still look for a job within their sofa, complaining of hard times, and those who dreamed ambitiously, achieved something, even under such difficult circumstances, after passing through the watch, non-payment, cheats, spending the night in cold rooms etc.
My friend returned from a trip to the outskirts of the "republic". He was impressed - his client’s roof burned from the shelling. Of course, not only the roof was damaged, and it would be logical to leave the place only a few kilometers from the front line, and where no one excludes another shelling.
But the owner of the damaged house manically restores the loss: "I was born here, and I will die here". And there are lots of such people who do not see their life anywhere except their land. I would not have understood it before. If the situation is bad - run, sell, leave, look for a better life. But on your own land you start to appreciate the black soil from which you have been picking marl for years and which seems to be familiar to the touch. When you abandon your land, you abandon not only your parental home, but your roots, past history.
Yesterday I cleaned the yard - the first spring work, the first corns from the rake in this season. And I realized that I just buy time. I missed this soil, the smell of the fireplace, the cries of ducks. Missed the conversations of my neighbors on their way from work. Ten years ago, I would not have understood it. Just the soil and ducks, just the work that has to be done. And with age comes this very different understanding that the land is more valuable than everything else around.
And at the same time I realize that to leave - is to betray the memory of generations, the labor invested in this land, to betray the roughened hands of old men who knew this land to the touch. Just black soil, and, therefore, it values too much. And this understanding comes either with age, or after all of the experience here. But it is no longer possible to give up and to leave it.
Olha Kucher, Luhansk, for OstroV